about the talking fish

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Writer. Wheelman. Occasional DIY mechanic. Walking collection of hang-ups. Hopeless romantic. Old-school. Analog soul in a digital world. I am all of these things and more.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

"Nazakenaii...!"

For all the experience, talent and skill I have, I found out that I can still lose my self-confidence with disturbing ease. That sliver of self-loathing and doubt lurks at the back of my head, always ready to strike, debilitating me, reducing me to the sniveling 12-year-old with low self-esteem I was.

Only this time, I am stuck in a twentysomething’s body and the world will accordingly be less accommodating. The world will not show compassion for my self-pity, nor wait for me to regain my self-confidence.

Yes, I am afraid, nervous and unsure.
===

Am I such a droolin' fool
That all I ever think of is you?
And am I such a ludicrous girl
To make you the center of my world?

Springtime has come and gone again
When my phone rings, I'm hoping it's you
Although I shouldn't want it to

Because you, you are my greatest flaw
And I'm so ashamed to say
I'll do it again everyday
You, you are my greatest flaw
I know that I am smart;
Can somebody tell my heart?

I want to see you, then I don't
I'll drag you to the feelings, I won't
And when I do you're wasting my time
Trashing what is left of my spine

Summer is playing its greatest hit
Every Friday I hope that we meet
Although I shouldn't wish for it

Because you, you are my greatest flaw
And I'm so ashamed to say
I'll do it again everyday
You, you are my greatest flaw
I know that I am smart;
Will somebody tell my heart?

Didn't I tell you so?
Didn't you even know?
Didn't I tell you so?
Yes I know, know, know,
You're my greatest flaw because you...

And I know that I am smart;
Will somebody tell my, somebody tell my heart?
You, you are my greatest flaw;
I'm so ashamed to say
I'll do it again everyday
You, you are my greatest flaw
I know that I am smart;
Will somebody tell my heart?
Somebody tell my heart...

—D’Sound, “My Greatest Flaw”

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