about the talking fish

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Writer. Wheelman. Occasional DIY mechanic. Walking collection of hang-ups. Hopeless romantic. Old-school. Analog soul in a digital world. I am all of these things and more.

Friday, February 21, 2003

Testing testing...

Mommy Tin was conscientious enough to inform me via PM that my blog had disappeared.

Thanks a lot, Tin.

I can't deny it now: people do read my blog. Heheheh.

Wednesday, February 19, 2003

Been quite a while since I last posted. Heheheh.

It's been a great great week to be online, especially on OB and HCP. These two forums have seen one member of each either being banned or publicly humiliated for the stupidest things I've ever seen done online.

Just my advice, people: Don't count your chickens until they've hatched.

The week of my birthday has been plagued by a string of near-collisions with other cars while driving. My most dangerous so far was to avoid an absolutely stupid speeding Mazda 323 driver who never considered having enough space between his front bumper and the car in front of him. The damned fool tried a double lane change to the rightmost lane because he suddenly got blocked by two braking EK Civics on the first two lanes.

Was honking along at 130km/h myself on the "no swerving" right lane exiting to Bicutan. The moment this idiot crossed my line, I braked so hard I could see blue smoke behind me and hear my tires wailing. Luckily I passed by with nary a scratch.

I feel like quick-acting quick-thinking driver Takumi Fujiwara. "INITIAL D!"

I owe it to my family and friends new and old not to do anything like that again though. There are too many drivers here who are so stupid they wouldn't mind swapping paint with my blue SX8 City. Excuuuuuuuse me. Ibahin ninyo ako.

Shot pictures in Intramuros for my Print Production article last Wednesday. I didn't expect to see Pam in San Agustin Church with Ruth and her other friends.

She seemed okay---actually everyone seemed okay if a bit preoccupied. Ruth was the only one among them who was sticking around me, asking about my camera and macro lens. They still had to go to the port area afterwards.

Even though it felt like Pam didn't want to speak with me for long, it was nice seeing all of them again.

My pictures came out great. Especially good were those that were never meant to be on film in the first place. Heeheehee.

Everytime I try to talk to you
I get tongue-tied
Seems like everything I say to you
Comes out wrong and never comes out right

from "Why Don't You and I," Santana with Chad Kroeger

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

"Happy birthday to me!"

Just as I thought no one usually remembers my birthday, people left and right have been greeting me on my twentieth year alive. Must be due to the birthday functions on the boards, but it's still a nice feeling being greeted. Way better than thinking that no one cares, at least.

Got some birthday presents too. Pam gave me some stuff she brought from her Singapore trip not too long ago: a bracelet, a scented plush cow and boxers. Mom gave me a pair of stonewashed denim jeans and a leather belt. Coolest gift so far came from my dad: a Victorinox original "SwissChamp" Swiss Army Knife. I've been destroying my fingernails from prying open and playing with all the gadgets.

Lunch was an affair with OB friends Noel and Voltz at Liy Ming's.

So far, so nice.

An old accounting classmate of mine came up to me while I was reading the latest issue of The LaSallian the other day.

He started off at an awkward greeting, but increased his confidence when the topic changed to religion. He suddenly talked about God, Jesus and him being the only way to salvation, the fallacy of purgatory...other such religious stuff.

Honestly I don't like it when people dictate to me what I should think or believe. I have nothing against born-again Christians, but please don't force your beliefs on me because you'll only alienate people like me from your original aims. I am already an outspoken critic of the Catholic Church; don't make me a critic of your own faith. People have brains and free will; please respect that, dammit.

Friday, February 07, 2003

Call me a hick, but I spent my last conscious moments last night playing Breath of Fire III. I know people will call this franchise the "most boring RPG ever," but there's a certain charm to raising my dragon-boy Ryu and his friends up.

Excuuuuuuuse me.

Friends at HCP are thinking up ideas for an EB. They're thinking of going to Pasay for a day of karting.

If it does push through...hell, I'm in! I gotta know how much it costs though...and I hope it won't be prohibitively expensive. Or maybe I should just hold off karting until I have my own disposable income? That's going to be pretty far off.

I've been assigned to cover tourist spots in Manila for PRINPRO as my contribution for my class' magazine midterm project. Problem is, as of now I'm kinda spiffed as to where to go and when I should do so. I still have a week left.

Actually I wanted someone to come along with me on Wednesday, since I have just one class by then (we got a free day from Religion class). Hmmm...

Speaking of Wednesday, my birthday's actually coming along soon. My mom asked me about any plans I had for the 11th...and frankly enough, I said I didn't have any.

I suppose I've come to the point in my life when my own birthdays don't matter much to me anymore. Well, maybe at least not this one. My twentieth birthday falls in the middle of a particularly lonely term, where I'm pretty much left to my own devices.

What do I want to do now? I have to wonder. Do I want to meet my high school friends again? Do I want to dive into another relationship? Do I want to work part-time? Honestly, I'm feeling confused and lonely.

I suppose I should get used to feeling this sort of uncertainty, this constant uneasiness in my heart. Any semblance of security I've known for the better part of my existence will soon be gone, in---give or take---three years. Hell, job security won't be a given even for me.

I should learn how to truly be alone.

Lately I've rediscovered the joys of eating chocolate. I think I'm figuring out why women like the stuff so much. For crying out loud...it's natural Prozac.

Forget what I said about getting into relationships. Screw my longing to be with someone.

Now just isn't the right time.

I've been having the weirdest dreams these past few days, and most of them involve repeating some sort of death scene, over and over, ad nauseam. It's either my death or someone else's.

Creepy. Am I turning into another Denise?

Thursday, February 06, 2003

I am happy.

Monday saw me in the recording booth for Radio Production most of the time, fulfilling my roles as director, spinner and mixer. Being director had to be the most gratifying of them all, especially since the group I directed never had a chance to rehearse with me beforehand. I was amazed I managed to fit Patty's PSA in a little over 30 seconds on my first take, and that I was comfortable in command of my five-man team. We took six takes in total, and we managed to wring two good takes in the span of 10 minutes.

Being mixer is pretty cool too. I was amazed at how most of the work was actually on my fingers controlling the eight input sliders for the talents' mikes, background music and SFX. It felt the closest to being a real DJ, with headset and all.

Spinning literally means pushing "play" on the CD players and tape recorders. It's a boring job but it can unnerve me when I cue the SFX/songs wrong.

I really really like RADIPRO. I wonder if I can be a technical director for radio someday.

Tuesday was blah, except for my haircut. I am back to looking like the Mr. Soldier-Boy I was back in freshman year. This is in response to Beia and Rich's endless remarks about me looking fat because of my hair. It's not like my haircut's gonna improve my appearance any, but I'm rather sick of having prickly bangs in my eyes all the time.

My mom remarked about my new haircut by the time she got home. I should've told her this was my "old" haircut.

Traffic is hellish nowadays. I dread having to go home on evenings.

Made a little game for my ARTCOMB subject just a while ago. It's something in the mold of tic-tac-toe, with every square having a question on our report on DOS and Windows. I'm glad my unfamiliar classmates had lots of fun with it.

The next group had a game as well, with the subject matter being MS Excel. We won! Heheheh.

This was a good day.

Yesterday I saw my old high school classmate Ding at University Mall looking for PC CDs. Tapped her shoulder from behind, having the vaguest feeling that it was indeed her. It was nice seeing her after all this time, as she studies in DLSU-College of St. Benilde just across Taft Ave. But she always seems so busy, so I hardly see her around.

It's amazing how in the span of two years or so, she still looked the way she did back in high school, albeit with longer hair and a more formal-looking ensemble in place of her uniform. When I think about it, I look pretty much the same, too.

I miss high school. But then again, if it weren't for college, I wouldn't have learned that my world was never limited to the microcosm that is Alabang.

I've been getting tired more often in the past few days. Whenever I think of just lounging around in bed, I suddenly plop off to sleep. I wonder why. Has it something to do with the weird cold weather we've been having?

Sunday, February 02, 2003

Attended Otakuboard's EB last night at Greenbelt. Was a pretty nice occasion, actually, but it was kind of marred by Anna's late arrival with her friends from thesis defense. Beia and Rich were getting impatient as they had to leave for Hillsborough that night, and it was unclear as to who was going to eat with all twenty-something of us at Krocodile Grillery.

It felt like there were two EBs in one: the first with Rich and Beia but without Anna and her friends; the second the other way around. It was fun just the same, though, but I have to agree it could've been set up better.

Met the guy I was irritated with on OB...and it turns out he's a pretty okay fellow offline. Sharp sense of humor, too. I think he just needs to loosen up and realize that his problems ain't as bad as he thinks.

I have a new addiction now: Initial D. Yup, this is the most famous anime/manga on driving, drifting and street racing.

The sound of car exhausts at high revs is permanently glued to my ears nowadays, after watching episodes of the anime on Rich's VCDs. I'd stare in total awe as lead character Takumi Fujiwara excellently drifts his low-horsepower Toyota AE86 Trueno (lovingly known as the Hachi-Roku, Japanese for "eight-six") across the tight hairpin turns of Mt. Akina. This guy in a very very plebeian car beats people in cars from the next class up: R32 Skyline GT-Rs, S13 Silvias and 180SXs, FC and FD-series RX-7s...even a mighty Lancer Evolution IV! Hot damn!

Too bad a lot of the CDs don't work on my CD-ROM drive. Damnit.

Also, it's too bad 85% of cars here are front-engine, front-wheel-drive types (FF types) which can never drift. To learn how to drift, I'd need a front-engine, rear-wheel-drive (FR) car.

It's ultimately too bad that I'll never approach Takumi's god-like skill of drifting.

Oh well, there's always the karting grounds at Pasay, but that's expensive.