about the talking fish

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Writer. Wheelman. Occasional DIY mechanic. Walking collection of hang-ups. Hopeless romantic. Old-school. Analog soul in a digital world. I am all of these things and more.

Thursday, October 31, 2002

Braved the atrocious midafternoon traffic along A.H. Lacson Ave. yesterday to go to my baby's place for the next installment of the Pam and JM Cooking Show.

She sliced mushrooms and potatoes while I grated cheese. Then she cooked the garlic, cheese, mushroom and potato mixture on low heat while stirring. We spooned the mixture into triangular dimsum wrappers, wrapping and sealing them before frying.

The result? Our vegetarian appetizer Deltas of Venus, the name inspired by my baby's birthday bash at Club S.EX.

I love making stuff with you, my baby. What's next on our menu?
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More presents from Cebu filled my trunk that day: a red Adidas shirt, a khaki fisherman's hat, three apricot scented candles, more of Cebu's dried mangoes and a Lilo and Stitch sticker strip.

Thanks, my darling.
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You guys still remember Erik? Turns out he got into an accident two days ago.

He was driving along the Katipunan flyover at 120 km/h (roughly 75 mph) when he tried overtaking a car immediately in front of him. Apparently he might have put too much weight into his steering, as his car (I believe it was an EK4 Honda Civic) spun off and struck the steel railing at the middle of the road. His front and rear bumpers were shorn off and a large part of his car's bodywork turned raisin-like in a matter of milliseconds. Bystanders thought the occupants of the red EK4 were dead. Worst of all, Erik had his ex-girlfriend in the front seat---who, I understand, was the source of all his misery, anger and rage a year ago.

Erik and his ex are still alive, but quite understandably shaken. Now he's trying to piece his life back together and re-evaluate things.

It's been a long time since the two of us had a decent time to talk and meet up again, largely because of my academic workload eating up any spare time I have and my lungs' intolerance for cigarette smoke. I was frankly shocked that something like this might happen to one of my friends, and it gave me a reason to value my friendships more. I am now aware that I should keep my ties alive, as anything---literally anything---can happen to them.

We at the Zen Clan miss you. You take care, dood.
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Anger isn't worth losing your life over.
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Car drivers who read my blog, heed my advice.

From personal experience, driving in the Philippines at 120 km/h is strictly for straight-line cruising along a wide, free road such as the Skyway...and I do mean STRAIGHT. Keep lane changing to an absolute minimum, and any braking should be done gradually and progressively. If it looks like you won't be able to stop in time, use engine braking but exercise extreme caution. This advice comes from a guy who's revved an AE101 1.6L Toyota Corolla to a honking 170 km/h, and I tell you it's scary to go anywhere but straight at that speed.

This weekend, or anytime you're free, check your wheel balances. Very important. You don't want your wheels to be weighted more at one side, because severe weight imbalance in your wheels will cause shanking to one side at high speed---and that's a recipe for a racing raisin, if you get my drift.

Friday, October 25, 2002

Snuck out of school after my last class today to visit Pam once more.

She prepared a little feast for me: chicken Hot Shots, rice, s'mores and our ice-cream pie. She brought out her VCD player and rolled a couple of episodes of Friends. We kissed, hugged and snuggled against each other in the kitchen, while trying to pry the newly toasted s'mores off the oven toaster rack with bread tongs.

Then I sang this song for her...I believe this is the Eraserheads' song "Fine Time":

I could drive you to the malls
Or stay home and watch TV
I don't care if we don't have lunch
Just as long as we have iced tea
I could take you to a film
Hunt for books and magazines
Is that new song out on sale?
I think that dress is kinda pale...

I hope we could spend more time together
A few hours is better than never
If we could only make it longer
A whole day would be fine, a whole day would be fine
A whole day would be fine, a whole day would be fine...

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I love you, my baby. Napakasarap mong kasama.

Wednesday, October 23, 2002

Just had a wonderful day.

I mapped out the route to Pam's house using my mom's Manila road atlas this morning, after buying ingredients for s'mores. After my one and only class ended, I borrowed a couple of books and spun my engine towards the Sta. Cruz district.

When I finally parked in front of Pam's house, we didn't get around to making s'mores. We made banana-vanilla ice cream pie instead, crust and all. I got introduced to her beloved grandma and grand-uncle, and later on had lunch with them. She gave me so many gifts from her recent spelunking of Cebu City---dried mango strips, dried squid flakes, a shirt, a coconut-shell mask and a little diary.

When it was time for me to go, I drove her to work. For once I didn't mind being stuck in traffic along truck-infested Quirino Ave. We were kissing and hugging all the time, savoring the time we had on our hands.

I love you, my darling. You make me feel so alive. I could picture myself going to your house regularly, just being with you.

Tuesday, October 22, 2002

I miss you...

Monday, October 21, 2002

I'm stumped, honestly. This new template I chose seems a lot more complicated than my blog's old one. I don't know where to insert my meager knowledge of HTML just so I can personalize my blog.

Hmmm.

I'll attempt to fine-tune what I can do so, but expect my blog to look messed up.
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I am sad. I don't know why things suddenly crop up and interfere with my plans, especially if it's with my baby. We meet only once a week and yet this is when people call on me the most...I guess it's probably because of that wonderful 90-minute respite called U-Break...

I don't want to attend any storyboard meetings. I don't want to attend any make-up classes. I just want to be with my darling again.

Friday, October 18, 2002

This week has been very tiring.
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After my only class in the morning, I sped off to Mandaluyong City on Wednesday to get an interview with the assistant director of the program "On Air" for my Intro to Broadcasting subject. This was after I had to burn PhP3,000 the night before to avail myself of a tape voice recorder in desperation.

Getting there was rather tough because of the traffic (I hate swerve-happy buses), but actually parking my car was another challenge. Mandaluyong is not like Makati or Manila which have scores of lots for motorists to park their cars in for a fee. The building's basement parking was full. I managed to find parking on Reliance St., but it meant I had to walk some two kilometers back and forth from the lot to eat lunch at KFC and/or visit the Pioneer Highlands towers. This I did while I was being rained out at noontime.

When I finally did get inside the towers, the security guards still had to clear the equipment I brought in---my trusty camera, tripod, lenses and brand-spanking new recorder. And I even had to pay PhP3 for the forms I wrote on. Urgh.

Finally I was up the elevator to the offices of Ideal Minds Corp. to have an interview with Aleah Aliporo. I have to say the interview itself went very well. She was a willing subject and she symbolized how the innovative program was their "baby."

"On Air's" premise is that they provide you a minute to tape whatever you want to do, and they'll broadcast it on their half-hour show every Friday. If you get voted by the audience as the "pick of the week" you can win PhP5,000. So as it is, my prof and I think it turns the broadcasting concept upside-down in terms of ownership and opportunity.

I went back to school afterward, satisfied with my efforts. Thank you, Ms. Aliporo.
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After my little adventure in Mandaluyong, I went into the school photo lab to print my first full-size picture. Not easy, considering that I was all alone in a room full of enlargers with nothing more than weak red "safelight" illuminating everything. It's rumored to be haunted by ghosts, too.

I'll have to get used to it, though. I can now say with all conviction that I love photography.
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Thursday was the usual dizzying mix of majors subjects: Print, Broadcast and Film Intros. Our Print professor assigned us to help him with his Journalism and Information Technology survey. He had the questionnaire forms; all we had to do was visit the newspapers or the beats of the reporters themselves. We volunteered to "saturate" the Senate's beat reporters with his questionnaires. I wonder when we'll have the time to do it though.

Later that afternoon we watched "Singin' in the Rain" on DVD for Film class. Very wonderful movie. I can see why it's part of the top ten American films of the twentieth century.

And still later that night, I went to Pam's birthday party to make amends. I wasn't able to watch her band play, though, as I had to leave when the party was just starting. Damn early Friday classes.

I love you, my darling. I just want to be with you again. If I were to be particular about it, I want to watch "Singin' in the Rain" with you.
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Which brings us to today. In Physical Education Tantan and I won a game of doubles badminton against our classmates. Had to scrape the skin off my knees though, but I'm cool.

Even more surprising was that I aced today's goodwill and bonus test in Accounting 2A. Not bad for someone who never studied a wink. Was divine providence at work here? I just hope it keeps up until tomorrow.

Speaking of tomorrow...shucks, I still have my Accounting midterms in the morning and a viewing of Akira Kurosawa's epic "Seven Samurai" in the afternoon.

I want to rest. But this week has been a blast.
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Pam's in Cebu City right now, and she won't be back until Sunday.

Come back to me, my lady...please take care...I love you...

Tuesday, October 15, 2002

I'm so driven to defend myself in this argument, but I suppose I'm just adding insult to injury. I know I should never edit myself, but some things are better left unsaid. Even if I risk being labeled an inconsiderate asshole both ways, I would elect to still the sounds of silence.

"When emotion takes a great hold of anyone, it's very hard to make one believe otherwise. One can never expect to win against emotion." - Leia Medina
I can't believe my run of luck yesterday.

I flunked my second accounting quiz, I'm grilled to make up for TLS newswork I'm not supposed to be doing, and most of all Pam thinks I forgot her birthday.
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I am at an end. I never claimed to be perfect nor experienced. I know not what I should do. I am just a mosquito anyone can kill with a slap of the wrist, and to make it worse I am but new to my duty.

The first mistake seems enough to kill me.
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A big thank you goes to my blockmate Leia. I hope she and Joseph last a long long time together. Don't forget your bet.

Friday, October 11, 2002

I'm rather sad I've missed posting at Otakuboard for so long already. It feels like I've somehow disappeared from the boards because of my focus on my major subjects.

The way things are going (i.e. school demanding my time), it looks like I won't be able to attend their sixth EB. Oh well.

Wednesday, October 09, 2002

It's been a really busy couple of days but I feel really good. FOTOCAM, especially, was a blast. In the span of two days I learned how to load, develop and prepare film negatives, and I also dabbled in a bit of enlarging and printing on photo paper.

Great. Just great. I can't wait to shoot more B&W pictures.
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One caveat: Judging from supplies alone, photography is rather expensive.

The film is cheap (COLPAN 21 is PhP40-75), but it needs its own developer (PhP80), as the M216 photo lab is stocked with Kodak developers which are for Tri-X and T-Max films at PhP175-190 a roll. Photo paper from Kodak meanwhile is PhP285 for 25 pieces.

I wonder if I have to request for a raise in allowance. It's only Wednesday and I barely have enough money left for two days' lunches.
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Took this test and was pleasantly surprised. Got 13 out of 16 right, just like my baby did. Must have been love working in the background...

Speaking of Pam, we didn't have our usual Wednesday date this week. She's too busy with school work and has had hardly enough time to sleep.

Baby, I want you to fall asleep beside me...I want to watch you sleep peacefully...without a care in the world...I love you that much...

Monday, October 07, 2002

My blog is now officially one year old. Been a great year, honestly. Because of my blog it's also been a year where I could look back at how I've grown and maybe gone rough around the edges a little.

I guess I deserve some credit or something, blogging this long and all, but I have so many things to do.
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Chabeli was right: we've done nothing but school work these past few weeks. I could almost smell the veiled regret in her normal cheery self.
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There's this rather sad, somber piano tune playing on what I think is Winamp Radio. Just when I picked up my headphones it suddenly began playing. Must be on one of the sites I have open right now.

Is that your blog, love?
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I'd like to think I mastered the painful art of affixing my used film into the developing tank's spiral---in the darkness of a changing bag. Thank God.

Also used up the roll of black and white film Pam gave me for my FOTOCAM class. Took so many shots of the most unexpected things, and I hope I get to develop them properly. I'd like to do justice to my shots. I just hope I didn't ruin any of them with camera shake.
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Produced my first two articles for The LaSallian, too. My second one was something on scalping and harassment.

Hope it gets published in its virgin state.

This has been a very productive term for me so far.
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Tell me how I can be a better man, love. I find it rather disheartening at times how easily I get you hurt, and I believe it's because I'm not sensitive enough to what you're feeling, or what's on your mind. I'm so very sorry for the times I hurt you, and I didn't even know it.

I guess I now realize something I should do: I should just shut up and listen.

One more lesson I can't learn in any book, I guess.

Thursday, October 03, 2002

I'm feeling so crass and angry with my sister. I have to put up with driving her to school and back, her being unfriendly 99% of the time, and her offending comments towards me. With the state of things I'm just keeping my cool with the ungrateful wench.

She borrowed my PE shirt the other day because the maids forgot to let hers dry. Then she told me right after I fetched her from Kingswood that she forgot it at her friend's car right before I need it. Now very angry, I wanted to mash the Pregio's pedal to the floor and make her scream. She offered money to buy me a shirt tomorrow, but I have only one term of PE left and that ridiculous amount of money would be wasted.

I take in all her bullshit and even make the initiative of being a real brother to her, but all she does is pull away. I wanted to slap her so hard. I couldn't bring myself to do so, though. Little old abusable Mr. Convenient, that's what I am.
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I've been wondering how my life would have turned out if Pam and I didn't make that step forward into this bond we enjoy today.

My friends and blockmates tell me they knew it all along, that she and I would be deliriously in love with each other. Looking back, and after considering what they said, I guess it was just a matter of when, exactly, I would fall in love with her. We think alike, we have differing but similar interests and we are always together in one way or another. She's my new best friend, as well...with her I can be an open book, replete with craziness, insanity and emotions I would have fearfully hidden from everyone else.

I'm still left in amazement at how we met, became friends and became the mushiest pair of cheesecake lovers our friends had ever seen.

I love you so much, my lady, and I want to prove it in so many ways...