Leaving March with a few kind words

I'm usually crappy at reading up on other people's blogs...and for that I apologize.

Proof of that is this belated New Year's post I read on Dynee's blog, which is one of the most unexpected yet touching things I've come across. I'm not used to people paying me any compliments, so this is a surprise I liked.

It's been so many years since she left that comment on this same blog, and never did I think that we'd end up working for the same firm or have a lot of things in common. It's a nice feeling, knowing that I've actually inspired someone else.

Death of a dream?

People who've known me from my high school days know that I've had real experience doing the dirty work of writing, designing layout and preparing to print a magazine. Indeed, all this experience really influenced me in choosing my courses in college. I tried to continue my enthusiasm for the magazine into college, but got tripped up by my inability to follow beats in preparation for writing a decent news article.

College aside, my time with Counterpoint was definitely one of my most productive spells I've ever had in my lifetime. As layout editor, I was in love with the entire process of making a magazine from a bunch of articles and photos, trying to synthesize all of them into one cohesive, attractive-looking whole. Working with Adobe PageMaker and InDesign since the sixth grade taught me the importance of a proper "preflight" check of a project before sending it off to the print shop, and the creative power one can wield with only two inks -- usually black and PANTONE 121 CVU for me (a bright yellow to everyone else).

Fast forward to today, and I am saddened by the realization that the Internet has saturated our lives so much that entire magazines and newspapers such as the Seattle Post-Intelligencer and San Francisco Chronicle are closing up shop, opting to become entirely "Internet-only" publications.

I never really got the hang of HTML. Sure, I hard-coded an entire website once in the past with nothing but Notepad, but I found the whole process exceedingly clunky and nowhere near as intuitive as using PageMaker/InDesign. I am aware that the Internet opens so many other ways of turning a web page into eye candy, but most of the animated banners I see on websites do them no favors as coherent wholes. Novelty for the sake of novelty, I'd say. From a design standpoint, I've always believed in keeping things simple -- my tools involving nothing more than typefaces and drawn objects.

Back in high school I thought I could make a living as a layout editor for a magazine. That probably isn't the case in the US any longer, with magazines slowly slipping into obsolescence, taking one of my greatest ambitions along with them.

Hugs and kisses

Sometimes, all I really need to break me out of my rut of depression and self-pity is the knowledge that someone still loves me, despite my personality flaws and quick temper.

Sometimes, all I really need to soothe my tired soul is a warm, enveloping hug from someone who knows their true worth.

Sometimes, all I really need to calm my frayed nerves are kisses so balmy from lips so soft that they relax me to the core.

Thank you Mav, for six months of joy and gladness. I love you!

Millionaire by thirty?

On a whim I bought myself a copy of Doug Andrew's book "Millionaire By Thirty: The Quickest Path to Financial Independence." Despite my hobby-slash-vice of car modification, I am interested in trying to make my money grow.

I'm almost halfway through the book, and he does offer quite unconventional advice. Never have I heard of actually embracing a select amount and type of debt to make money. Unfortunately most of the tips the Andrews offer -- Doug shares writing credits with his two sons -- seems more applicable to the US than the Philippines. I have no idea, for example, if his suggestion of getting a mortgage is as tax-deductible here as it is in America.

Because of that, my feelings toward the book are mixed. Great tips, yes -- but I have no idea if they'll work here.

The perennially late reaction engine

No, that's not something from Macross. I'm talking about myself.

Lately I seem to have become a reactionary hair-trigger. It's not as if it's anything new. I guess I've struggled with this my whole life. This past week I've failed putting a throttle on my reactions, the end result being a huge mess that's gotten me in trouble with my leads.

They've expressed their disappointment with me. It's a shame I have such a tendency to snap at people because my skills are more than adequate, they told me. Why don't you realize your reactions have an effect on the people around you?

I can't go on like this. The world is becoming less and less forgiving of my actions. I feel like I'm always playing catch-up and learning the old lessons in a ball game everybody else has played and finished at least once. Not everyone understands that I'm basically a late bloomer. How long am I going to be a late bloomer? How long will I go through the motions of learning things I should have known years ago because everybody else does?

This just bums me out. The pathetic thing about this is I can't turn to anyone for help.

MoMo!

Just thought I'd share a few photos of a nice place Mav and I found in Robinsons Place Ermita. MoMo! is a little new cafe which college students frequent (or infest) due to free WiFi. However I feel they could make much more if they downplay the WiFi a little, because they do make really good food.

Okay, so their Ultimate Mac & Cheese isn't so ultimate, but the 10" Smoked Salmon with Dill Cream Cheese pizza is a decadent, yummy treat and can literally make your visit there.

We're going back there for dessert.


More photos over here.

Allergies and red seats

Now I know the name of the condition that's afflicted me with sinusitis, altered vision, unworkable headaches and vertigo whenever I get a bad cold: allergic rhinitis. As it turns out, this doesn't have a cure and all I can do is manage it and try to avoid the allergic triggers. This month's bout of it has chopped away four days off my working month.
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As my birthday gift to myself, I finally took the splurge on semi-bucket seats. I'm afraid the "Digo fund" never went toward the purchase of a Bride Digo seat, however. Instead, I got a pair of red Recaro SR3s from the original DC2 Honda Integra Type R and/or the EK9 Honda Civic Type R. For the price and the condition of the seats, I got them quite cheap.


Right now they're sitting on the floor of my room though, as I soldier on with Aibo's stock perches. Why? The SR3s didn't come with seat rails compatible with my GD1 Jazz. To make them link up with Aibo's bones, I ordered a set of Bride RO-type seat rails, which will interface flawlessly with the seats and Aibo's chassis. The only fly in the ointment is, they'll take a month at most before they make it here because the Japanese supplier doesn't have any of them in stock.

I can already hear my knees thanking me, though.

Jared is itching to help me with the DIY install of these babies. I can't wait either.

Two car clubs mourn the death of one great man.

It started out just like any other day. I went to work, fired up the computer and went to the JaCU forum for any updates.

The update that greeted me left me astounded and in disbelief. Francis Javier, the beloved "Frankster" of Honda Club Philippines and Philippine Jazz and City United, had passed away due to cardiac arrest on February 19, 2009. He was thirty years old.

He was one of the kindest and most responsible souls I'd ever met. Francis tirelessly attended the EBs and GTs (get-togethers) even if he himself wasn't feeling so good. He was also a genuine car nut just like me, his affection extending to even the most obscure automotive curiosities. His GD6 Honda City is testament to his passion for turning even arguably the "ugly duckling" of the recent Honda car lineup into something even the American members of FitFreak.net lust for.

A few days before he passed away, he was ecstatic at having driven a friend's yellow Honda NSX at the recent JaCU February EB. He seemed hale and hearty the whole day. Little did we all know that his collapse and admittance into the hospital just the previous month was the forebear of his impending passing. He was born with a congenital heart defect that left his heart enlarged, he told me, and with it came all sorts of cardiac maladies, palpitation to name just one.

Steve of JaCU remarked on the Honda Club Philippines forum that Francis was supposed to be next in line as JaCU's president. I have no doubt he would have been as fine a president as Juno Ongteco was/is for HCP.

Francis' act will be a tough one to follow. He will be missed and I am sure he is now in a better place, certainly one where he no longer has to worry about the condition of his fragile heart.

Twenty-six revolutions around the sun, and counting

Waking up to The Twilight Zone featuring the comedian stuck in hell.
Stool samples in a glass jar of dulong.

A lucky break thanks to the parking security guard at Cybergate 1.
Annual physical examination.
Peeing into a cup and a bottle without any privacy.
The crawling southbound traffic of C5 at 10:45 am.
Emission testing at Makati.
Counting just how many colleagues bothered to greet me.
Counting the cold shoulders.
Wondering if I should toot my own horn.
Doing zilch at work.
Fatigue setting in.
Leaving work early.
Dinner with Mav at the Stock Market in Bonifacio High Street.
Cornbread pudding with whisky caramel sauce.
Hilarious online birthday greeting cards from Auntie Carole and Uncle Butch.

Overall, not a bad way to turn another leaf in that calendar of my life. But damn, that cornbread pudding just has to take the cake.

Right Mav?Happy birthday to me.

My baby Maby is well again!

After spending a few days in the renovated Makati Medical Center, Mav is back on her feet and cured of her gastritis. Yay!

There are a few caveats though, the most notable being the short list of foods that she is permitted to eat for the next couple of weeks. Apparently everything else will just screw with her gastrointestinal tract and give her hyperacidity as well.

It's a small price to pay, I guess. At least she's graduated from that liquid diet the doctors first gave her...I know first-hand how fed up she was with plain old rice porridge.

Her illness did make for an interesting "date." I spent my Saturday in her hospital room, tending to her while I relieved her parents as they took the time to go home.

Thanks for your prayers guys! Mav sends her thanks.

An idiot of sadness no more.

My love and I, we work well together
But often we're apart
Absence makes the heart lose weight, yeah
Till love breaks down, love breaks down

Ooh my oh my, have you seen the weather?
The sweet September rain
Rain on me, like no other
Until I drown, until I drown

When love breaks down, the things you do
To stop the truth from hurting you
When love breaks down, the lies we tell
They only serve to fool ourselves
When love breaks down, when love breaks down

My love and I, we are boxing clever
He'll never crowd me out
Both be free as old confetti
And paint the town, paint the town

When love breaks down, the things you do
To stop the truth from hurting you
When love breaks down, the lies we tell
They only serve to fool ourselves
When love breaks down, we join the wrecks
Who leave their hearts for easy sex
When love breaks down, when love breaks down

My love and I, we were high and climbing
Into the sky of blue
Loud with colors, of a rainbow
A changing view, a changing view

When love breaks down, the things you do
To stop the truth from hurting you
When love breaks down, the lies we tell
They only serve to fool ourselves
When love breaks down, we join the wrecks
Who leave their hearts for easy sex
When love breaks down, when love breaks down

- Lisa Stansfield, "When Love Breaks Down"
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Not too long ago, I did some pretty stupid things because I couldn't accept failing with you despite all the effort.

I am not walking down that road again. I am at least a little wiser now. More importantly, my heart now has what I need to see me through this.

All I have to do is toughen my mind.

Bum gut gone too far...

My girlfriend Mav is quite seriously sick.

She's had a case of bum gut that has lasted much, much longer than it should. The doctors have diagnosed it as gastritis, and they've treated her for it, but for some reason her tummy's still busy doing painful cartwheels and making her puke. She's now been confined in Makati Medical Center for observation, at a most inopportune time---the hospital is in the middle of renovation and it's taking an eternity for her to get her own room.

Please pray for her, guys. I want nothing more than to have her healthy again.

Soft spending vs. hard spending?

Two weeks went by so fast.

In that span of time, my beloved Auntie Carole and Uncle Butch visited from LA, stayed with us, walked around the malls, shopped for clothes, ate out, ate in, played golf, danced, drank coffee, drank booze...and generally just had a really great time. Just the other day they flew back.

I miss them already. I miss driving them around. I miss Uncle Butch's jokes and Auntie Carole's jolly demeanor. Even though I don't watch local TV, I miss how they'd all go ga-ga over Wowowee.
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As it turns out I might see them again within the year. If all goes well, I might be able to join them in Waikiki Beach in Hawaii for Uncle Butch's nephew Marco's wedding some time in August. I've already done my sums for the round-trip ticket prices, and as far as I know my US visa's still good for a few more years.

Uncle Butch told me he loves the place even though he's been there four times already. He would gladly forego buying a brand-new TV if it meant going to Waikiki again. He told me the material things will get old and worn-out, but trips and experiences like these with my loved ones are what I'd remember when I'm old and gray.

I'm already set on saving up for Aibo's mods...but the man has a point. We'll see.

In the meantime, I'm planning to take Mav to Clark for the Philippine Hot Air Balloon Festival, and to the Avilon Zoo in Rizal. Those should make for a couple of interesting dates.

Time for some music

This song comes courtesy of my music-loving friend Anton Guidotti.

(Keep the fire bright)
There's a river in
The evening ember glow
And you're wishing you could see
How far it flows
Rolling on to an endless sea
You'd be well on your way
If you could only set sail

But dreams can drift away
And sails can fill with doubt
Where's your vision
If the embers flicker out?
Don't let it slip from view

The horizon's awaiting
Your river is fading

So keep the fire burning tonight
See just what comes into sight
Don't take forever
Take it through the night
And believe the sun
Will rise with the dawn
That's all you need to go on
But for tonight
Just keep the fire burning bright

I will never need to ask
What have I done?
Comes a moment when it's clear
There's only one
Oh, whatever you need of me
I've made up my mind
I give you more than you've asked for

There are those who can foresee
Where we will go
All the future
I don't really want to know
Only that you'll be here with me

While the embers still glow
We'll be safe till tomorrow

Keep the fire burning tonight
See just what comes into sight
Don't take forever
Take it through the night
And believe the sun
Will rise with the dawn
That's all you need to go on
For tonight
Just keep the fire burning bright

Keep the fire burning tonight
See just what comes into sight
Don't take forever
Take it through the night
And believe the sun
Will rise with the dawn
That's all you need to go on
For tonight
Just keep the fire burning

(Keep the fire bright)
Who are you?
(Keep the fire bright)
Where are you
(Keep the fire bright)
You're not alone
It's so wonderful
(Keep the fire bright)

- Kenny Loggins, "Keep the Fire"

The grim and the merry

A couple of my friends have been struck down with pretty serious illnesses.

Francis Javier of JACU has had a pre-existing heart condition, but following the January 2009 EB he reportedly collapsed and had to be brought to the ICU. His heart had been palpitating and beating very fast---I believe the condition's called tachycardia, which literally means "racing heart." It didn't help that his heart was enlarged and wounded from the inside.

He's now out of danger, but another friend, my ex-team lead Jenny Layugan, has been confined in Asian Hospital for a while now due to dengue. Apparently it was the more serious hemorrhagic variety, because this morning I got a number of text messages asking for type B-positive blood to help her make it through.

My prayers are with both of these people.

On a happier note, a belated happy birthday goes out to Dynee Balleza-Sheafor of Madison, Wisconsin.

'Tis the season for mechanical curiosity

It's been a very interesting couple of weeks for a gearhead like me.
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Because of a runaway piece of debris (concrete or dense wood, I'm not really sure what) snaking across the SLEX, one of Aibo's wheels had a very strong impact---strong enough to bend the rim out of shape and rip my Bridgestone S-02PP rubber along with it.


I had planned on replacing the S-02s---great tire with full tread depth, but due for replacement at seven years old---for a while now, and it seemed like the best opportunity to do so. After I had the wheel repaired, I raided the phone line looking for tires in my 205/45R16 size. Disappointed that the Yokohama S.Drives were out of stock just about everywhere, I decided to experiment this time with a brand that's not very popular here: Toyo.


After hearing about their great performance from overseas, I had already inquired about the Toyo Proxes T1R. They didn't have those in my size, so I ordered the Toyo Proxes 4 all-season radials instead. Armstrong, the distributor, even offered free dry nitrogen fillup for the lifetime of the tires. 200 kilometers in, I find the Proxes 4s quieter and more refined than the noisy S-02PPs, but are just as grippy and have a much longer treadwear rating.

The only downside to all this is the state of my Digo fund, which is now completely spent.
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Yesterday saw me at Glorietta to check out the all-new GM-chassis Honda City. Unlike its GD forebear, the GM's styling no longer looks like a Jazz hatchback with a trunk (still at a capacious and usefully shaped 506 L) hurriedly grafted to its rear. Indeed, it's different enough that it doesn't share the GE chassis code of the new Jazz. The car is gorgeous, well-equipped and looks like a slightly smaller FD Civic; however, the price is not quite as pleasant. Its price encroaches dangerously close to FD Civic territory, and at PhP806,000 is even a few thousand pesos more expensive than the top-flight GE Jazz. The car itself is great, though, and deserves to succeed.

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Finally I got not just one pleasant surprise, but two, in today's Jazz and City United monthly EB. Forced-induction pioneers Rico and Ken invited me to hitch a ride on their boosted rocket sleds. As Rico wound the engine to 5000 RPM, with 8 psi of turbo boost jamming into the cylinders and hissing like a vacuum cleaner on steroids, I was astonished at how the GD Jazz could handle such acceleration and speed. The sheer muscle these two silver hamsters had defied all my expectations---I had a hard time believing these started life essentially the same as Aibo!


We screamed along the Kalayaan flyover, dashing past cars with no need for downshifts, such was the torque of these blown L13A3 motors. Ken's Jazz sported TEIN Super Compact coilovers, one of my erstwhile dream mods. I got to sample their ride for the first time, fully expecting my backbone to be jarred stiff and silly...but it didn't happen at all! Even while seated at the back, a problem area for the GD Jazz, the TEIN dampers just kept the forces of the car's body at bay while delivering quite the supple ride. I daresay it even rode better than Aibo's stock suspension. Maybe I should reconsider getting these...

Answered prayer

I thought it would never come, but I got a pleasant surprise at 7 am Tuesday morning with nobody else in the office.

Software Certifications sent me the e-mail I had been waiting for throughout the holidays. I was expecting it to arrive in time as a Christmas gift, but I guess even they have to take a holiday break sometimes.

I opened the link embedded in the e-mail...and punched my fist in the air with delight. I am now a Certified Software Test Engineer.

The certificate will come in the mail in the future, but knowing that I passed the CSTE examination with flying colors and a smashing score was perhaps Santa's way-overdue Christmas present this year.

Thank you Mav, for reviewing and quizzing me despite my horrible head cold. Thank you Sharon, for giving me the opportunity to step forward unhindered with this exam. Thank you Eric, Marie and Aileen, for facilitating the review classes and making sure we learned what we could. Thank you Ian, for being a great partner. Thank you to my classmates for the insights.

Thank you all!

2008 was a good year for...

Love. Mav and I have been together for three and a half months at this writing...and every minute has been a blast so far. My waiting seems worth it because I really don't want anybody else. I love you my baby.

Cooking. Not so long ago I learned how to cook my very first real dish, and even served it to my colleagues soon after. With great results, may I add. Here's to more culinary capers.

Saving. I set myself an ambitious financial target with the Bride Digo seat, and I've proven I can discipline myself enough financially to reach it. The funny thing is, no matter how hard I've saved up these past four or five months, I'm still nowhere near buying the damn thing because so many other expenses got in the way. The final nail in that coffin was when I went to Auto Circuit a few days ago, only to be told they didn't have stocks. No matter, the "Digo fund" has gone to good use---mainly revolving around car maintenance. And I'm still saving.

My car. Boy, was my Aibo spoiled: new wheels, hub-centric rings, Work RS lugnuts, rust removal, repainting, detailing, and the promise of new modifications around the corner. He even got his fifteen seconds of fame by appearing on Honda's Challenge Magazine. This was also the year I appreciated the peculiarities of washing a car properly.

Knowing who my real friends are. I've had a lot of bullshit come my way this year, but I take comfort in the fact that my real friends have stayed with me despite the pain. Even though some of them have left me behind, their presence spurs me to continue living forward.

2008 was a bad year for...

My car and its accidents. My stock wheels got damaged by a huge rut along the Sta. Rosa SLEX entry point. Friday July the 13th really bit hard into my and Aibo's ass when a bus-shaped, bus-sized suppository came crashing into my life. Aibo got white paint droplets from careless painters at my workplace. A few days ago, one of my 16" wheels suffered damage due to a runaway piece of dense, chopped firewood that snaked across the SLEX. Everything's been repaired now, but really, how I wish Aibo and I could have avoided all of that expense and grief!

Reconnecting. Getting in touch with Dynee Balleza-Sheafor was the sole highlight this year. Everything else went sour quickly, to the point that there are some people I do not want to see ever again.

Health. I can't count the number of times a simple cold managed to complicate itself this year into something more serious. This year had me suffering from more fatigue than ever before, too.

Exercise and fitness. There are a number of reasons why I was a failure at keeping fit this year. Perhaps I've lost my motivation. Perhaps I've pushed myself too hard at exercising to the point that I actually got sick after a taebo session. Whatever the reason is, I have a fitness goal to work on in 2009.

Work. I'm still thankful I have my job, but it's definitely become much less of a pleasurable experience than it used to be. The atmosphere in my workplace resembles a garrison sometimes. It doesn't help that most of the colleagues I've held dear have left for greener pastures, either. I'm beginning to wonder if I can last the number of years I promised myself I would.

CHRISTmas 2008: No time for long faces

Christmas sure isn't doing me and my stomach any favors. With food being served left and right, it's a major challenge just trying to keep control. Some dietitians say people shouldn't deprive themselves or exercise too much control over their diets over the holidays, but the scary truth is, a lot of people seem to die in December or January due to hypertension or heart attacks. Until I can shed these Christmas calories, hot tea is my friend.

People say us Filipinos are a lucky bunch in these times because we hardly feel the effects of the global economic recession that's torn chunks out of every other country. Whether it's due to Philippine economic factors such as low production of exports, or the opinion that "we've been in shitty times before the recession anyway" is debatable, although both are valid. In the US, though, things are pretty bad (or are they really? The Americans have a habit of exaggerating and living in the extremes, right Dynee?). People are waiting with bated breath over the future of their careers; not even my beloved Uncle Butch's tenure is bulletproof now.

I know I frequently criticize Fr. Ramon Ramos' overly long homilies and repetitive themes, but his sermon today was really on point. So much of the things we say and sing about the season aren't really related to Christmas itself. It's not about overflowing food and chestnuts roasting on an open fire, or dashing through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh, and it's definitely not about being broken-hearted or having gifts. The real reason we're celebrating today is because the Man Upstairs loved us so much that He wanted to see how it was like living as one of us. That very thought alone is cause for a lot of celebration---so despite the so-called recession, let's not have Him catch us with long faces. Let's not forget Him in our revelry, either.

Merry Christmas, everyone.