about the talking fish

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Writer. Wheelman. Occasional DIY mechanic. Walking collection of hang-ups. Hopeless romantic. Old-school. Analog soul in a digital world. I am all of these things and more.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

I'm quite happy these days because we're actually finishing our thesis. As it stands we actually stand to exceed the 100-page limit and we're missing just one chapter, with the other four chapters needing just some polishing.

I really hope our defense goes well on December 3. Doc Nards will surely help us when we meet him tomorrow for revisions.
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I just don't like how confused I've gotten recently. I'm at that all-too-familiar point where I don't know what exactly I want, but I feel hollow, like I'm missing something.

Do I want a relationship? Do I want to move out of my house? Do I want to get work that makes me financially stable ASAP or do I want to do what I really want to do for a living? I wish I could be truly, madly, stupidly happy---but the world just won't allow me that luxury anymore.

All I know now is that I want to sing, and I want to buy the CDs of Jesuit music groups Hangad and Bukas Palad. And yes, I want to finish thesis and get on with my life.
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I absolutely love this song.


[I think I'll follow...
Follow...
In the greater scheme of...oooh...]

Tired of weaving dreams too loose for me to wear
Tired of watching clouds repeat their dance on air
Tired of getting tied to doing what’s required
Is life a mere routine in the greater scheme of things?

Through with taking roads someone else designed
Through with chasing stars that soon forget to shine
Through with going through one more day – what’s new?
Does my life still mean a thing in the greater scheme of things?

I think I’ll follow the voice that calls within
Dance to the silent song it sings
I hope to find my place, so my life will fall in place
I know in time I’ll find my place
In the greater scheme of things...

Each must go his way, but how can I decide?
Which path I should take; who will be my guide?
I need some kind of star to lead me somewhere far.
To find a higher dream in the greater scheme of things.

The road before me bends; I don’t know what I’ll find
Will I meet a friend or ghosts I left behind?
Should I even be surprised that you’re with me in disguise
For it’s your hand I have seen
In the greater scheme of things

I think I’ll follow the voice that calls within
Dance to the silent song it sings
I hope to find my place so my life will fall in place
I know in time I’ll find my place...

For yours is the voice in my deepest dreams
You are the heart, the very heart of the greater scheme of things...

So here I’ll follow the voice that calls within
Dance to the silent song it sings
I hope to find my place, so my life will fall in place
I know in time I’ll find my place...

Why don’t we follow the voice that calls within
Dance to the silent song it sings
One day we’ll find our place
For all things fall in place
For all things have a place
in the greater scheme of things...


- Hangad, "Pilgrim's Theme"

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