I got so spooked that when a blockmate of mine called for an assignment I could only answer him with a series of "uh-huhs."

I am scared of my parents. They are the sort of people I can never answer back to, even though I and others in my home know that they are very wrong. I am scared especially of my father. He will never, at any circumstances, accept his own mistakes. He will never back down from arguments even though he has nothing valid to retort further. And, given the chance of getting in a tight spot, he will not hesitate to resort to force.

I am scared of myself. Given enough agitation and a hot enough head, I can actually be my father's spawn. I inherited his temper and his arrogant self-righteousness. One thing prevents me from fully following his example however: my fear for the people I call my friends.

I don't know if it's any justification, but this is the reason why I opted to be a doormat, used and abused by other people. I wanted to contain my rash, impulsive character. Sadly, it's only leading me to self-destruction---and worse, I'm getting people I care about into my messes. I'm still getting tantrums and episodes of anger badly hidden by my silent, serious frowning face.