The COLPAN film negatives I shot last Friday evening got screwed by my clumsy loading inside the changing bags, so I had to buy film and photo paper, and reshoot my portraits yesterday. COLPAN 21 was out of stock, so I had to buy Kodak T-MAX 400 for a staggering PhP190 per roll, along with Kodabrome F3-grade paper for PhP310 (comparatively, not too bad a price).

I wish I didn't screw up loading my film negatives last Friday.

Even after nine minutes of developing in 1:1 solution of developer and water, T-MAX film has very bad contrast. No matter what I did with my brand-new LPL enlarger this morning, and all through the afternoon, I couldn't produce satisfactory 5" x 7" prints with the whitest whites and the blackest blacks. All my portraits had contrast problems, which had nothing to do with the way I shot my photos---some of them even without the intervention of my camera's meter (my batteries died on both shoots). I could only peer at my classmates' portraits with envy as they came out contrasty and sharp.

I'm glad I got to submit all 7 of my bad portraits and their test strips before 4:00 pm today, but I'm sorely irritated with the waste of photo paper T-MAX cost me. I started my FOTOCAM this term with with COLPAN, and I'll end it with COLPAN.

Now I see why my FOTOCAM classmates are all recent COLPAN converts. And at PhP45-75 a roll, plus PhP80 for Atlas developer, who wouldn't be?
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Speaking of my FOTOCAM classmates, they lifted me out of my midday mopes with absolutely the wackiest behavior we've displayed while inside the M216 photo workshop. We were actually singing our hearts out with the cheesiest songs while printing, laughing all the time. At one point we even cooked up a plan to drive Eastman Kodak into bankruptcy.

Thanks guys. We've only just met, but it means a lot to me.
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And speaking of moping, my darling was there with all-too-disconsolate me on the phone.

Love, we'll always get COLPAN film for my shoots. Thank you for everything. With you I am as human as I can possibly get, and I feel so liberated when I am with you.
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For now, I don't want to smell the pungent scent of fixer. Give me a break.